Monday, September 2, 2013

Dogs.

Lots of dogs.

We board dogs for friends and acquaintances when they go away. We charge a pittance, like ¼ of what the "luxury" kennels charge. This place would qualify as a luxury dog motel. They are welcome on all the furniture, there is a fenced backyard to scamper about in, two scheduled meal times a day, long walks (if it isn't too hot or too cold), three human slaves to tend to most of their needs. I usually bathe the dogs before their people come to get them and they also get manis and pedis. It's a good deal. We do it because we all love dogs and it is fun, all the humans enjoy it. Some of the permanent canine residents, not so much 8-). Jasper, I am talking about you.

Sometimes we are busy and other times there is a drought. In the last two weeks there has been a flood.
from the top row, our dogs, Barney, Max, Jasper, Ricky (who wasn't in the mood for photos), Karma
second row, Chewy, Roxy, Opal, Poppy is in there somewhere, Benny
third row, Boba, Benny & Barney, Karma Jasper Boba & Benny on a walk, Boba sleeping and Boba in the kiddy pool

We have our five, Barney, Max, Jasper, Ricky (aka Big Dick Rick), and Karma (aka Karmageddon). Then we got Roxy and Chewy. Then Poppy and Opal arrived. Nine. All we did was count dogs. In  and out, in and out. Roxy, Chewy and Poppy left. Leaving us with six. Then Benny and Boba arrived. sigh. Boba is a three month old Pomeranian and quite possibly the cutest puppy ever in the history of puppies, and he is a delight, almost housebroken already (sorry Sue). I thought he would be the difficult one. Little did I know.

Prior to this summer we didn't keep written records about the dogs we take. Notice the use of past tense.

We currently have an intact male with an intact female in heat. Oh Joy. Insert as many expletives as you can imagine here _______, I have said them all, I believe in the same sentence. Oh yes, it can be done. We knew Benny wasn't neutered, but we completely forgot about Opal. Fortunately Opal suddenly started behaving like a drunken co-ed at spring break and so it was impossible to miss that she is in heat. So Benny is wearing a belly band and Opal is in a crate or Benny is in a crate. Benny is behaving like a typical male of any species who wants sex, whimpering, begging, howling, crying. Delightful and not at all annoying (sarcasm). If he had a collarbone he would be beating his chest to show his macho-ness, as it is he is demonstrating his suitability for mating by trying to beat up Boba. Boba is having none of it and fights back fairly well for one so small. All the while Ricky and Jasper growl at anyone who walks by them, Max sleeps through everything, Barney looks disgusted, Karma of course thinks it is all a party, just for her and wants to be in the middle of all the action. Fun fun fun.

I think Opal is going home today. It can't possibly happen soon enough. If I knew what time they were getting in, I would meet them at the airport.

So the jist of this post is there will be no sewing for the foreseeable future. I'm sure you can all understand why.

22 comments:

  1. I guess it really is a dog's life around your house!

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    1. People have asked us if we will take them and give them the same treatment, but no..........

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  2. HOly Moly! I'm currently boarding for a friend. A special needs pooch - lots of allergies and not well behaved. School starts tomorrow (i'm a teacher) and I'm reaaaallllly tired. It's two weeks...hopefully we'll make it!

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    1. I realize it isn't always possible, but walk the crap out of the dog. Seriously. A tired dog doesn't have the energy to misbehave. All of mine are getting a 2 ½ mile walk daily, when you legs are only three inches long, that is a long walk.

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    2. That's what I'm doing - it's hard when I'm tired too, but worth it in the end. We have 11 more days to go!

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  3. Gosh, that's intense! I've only ever dealt with neutered dogs - I had no idea it was so much work.

    I hope you enjoy the dogs to the fullest extent, and plan some nice sewing for when you get an eventual break :-)

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    1. Unneutered male dogs are the WORST, their behaviour is beyond annoying and it never ever stops when there is a female in heat around. Which is why I have never had an intact male dog and never will.

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  4. Poor Benny...I thought you were describing my first husband! Procreation and penetration were high priority! Lordie, who has time for sewing? You must feel dog-tired at the end of all those 2.5 mile walks as well and maybe your pants are getting a little looser with all that exercise and summer temps! This year I raised my bridal rates $5 per hour and my volume went up 50%...so think about upping the fees and making room for more pooches next year! Higher rates have a perceived added value of quality...go figure. Bless you for being such a good mommy to all those canines!

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    1. "maybe your pants are getting a little looser" from your mouth to Gods ear. Did I mention we live in a very hilly neighborhood? And yes I am tired by the end of the day.

      We don't do it to make money, if we had too much business it might attract the attention of the city, and we aren't licensed for it, and wouldn't qualify for the necessary permits even if we wanted to.

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  5. You have managed to make a pretty trying situation amusing on this side of my computer screen.

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    1. That is what I was aiming for. Thank you!

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  6. Oh man I am SO glad that I'm not you right now. (No offense!) We used to have a horse boarding/breeding facility, and it was much the same, except on a larger scale. Well, and occasionally having to "assist" with the deed. UGH!! My parents have cattle too, but thank the deity of your choice that everything is done via AI for them--much less hassle.

    Those would be some....interesting(?) puppies for sure. Good luck in holding down the fort for a while longer!

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    1. Hey, I am glad I'm not you right now! Congrats again Mom to be.

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    2. Thanks! Trading now wouldn't be so bad, trading a couple of months ago though? ;-)

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  7. awwww, living somewhere we we aren't allowed pets, i'm jealous of all of the doggies! (yup, i totally get how much work goes into them).

    So Benny the Pomeranian is going after Opal the Sheltie? awwww

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    1. Wouldn't Sheltie and Pom cross puppies be cute? Opal has gone home now so it ain't gonna happen. Thank goodness.

      but they would be adorable

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  8. You had me giggling at Karmageddon, guffawing at the drunken co-ed at spring break, and tears rolling down my face at meeting them at the airport.

    Hope your sanity is as intact as Benny's manhood....

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    1. It was/is all too funny not to write about. I am pleased you enjoyed it.

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  9. N'awwwww, cute!! I think it's delightful you can help out your friend's furry friends. Kitty approved!

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  10. OMG, your wonderful person! This funny to read but not always so funny in the real world. We did ten days of pet sitting for a spunky young miniature poodle last year and this year a week with two old hounds. Makes us appreciate our two just as they are.

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    1. We do see the humour while the craziness is happening. Usually. I kind of like the craycray. But not for as long as it has been this time around.

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  11. We were almost trained till the damn fireworks started. Now we're almost back to where we once were.

    At one time Fudge, Samba, Tess, Lola, Grace, Bailey, and Norma Jean were all intact. Fudge did his best to convince me to let him into the yard with the girls. We somehow got thru all the staggered heats and now only Fudge is still intact. He checks all the girls daily to see if anything has changed. Hope springs eternal!

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